The people-pleaser is someone who prioritises other people, at the cost of themselves. They fear rejection, so they go above and beyond to make sure people like them. Their worst nightmare would be to upset or cause any ‘harm’ to someone else, so they bend and shape themselves, overcommit and offer more than they can give, in the hope this will ensure they keep people happy. Underneath it all they're tired, overstretched and need things to be different, but they don't know how else to be.
Do you resonate with any of the following?
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Giving a lot of yourself to everyone else: Nearly always saying 'yes' when you know you mean something else, offering to help when you don't have capacity, committing to things you're not realistically able to do.
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Bending and shaping yourself: Agreeing when you don't, apologising when it's not your fault, saying you 'don't mind' when you do, minimising your feelings and not vocalising your needs in favour of 'keeping the peace'.
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Feeling responsible for other people: Worrying about whether they are ok, feeling preoccupied by their problems as if they are your own, doing whatever you can to make things better for them, struggling to separate yourself from their feelings.
...If this is describing your experience, then I wrote this course with you in mind!
The course format
3 weeks of bitesized daily invitations to learn and reflect, with the flexibility to go at your own pace if you choose.
Audio Teachings
Short podcasts (the longest is 8mins) grounded in therapy theory, clinical work and personal insights.
Reflection Exercises
Prompts and invitations to deepen your learning and apply the teachings to your life and relationships.
Course Workbook
Everything in one place: written versions of all the podcasts & copies of all the exercises.
People-pleasing isn't an unchangeable character trait - thankfully it has much, much less to do with who you are as a person than you might think!
What the course covers
Understanding your people-pleasing: You'll be introduced to some simple psychology that helps explain the people-pleasing pattern and why it feels hard to stop, so you can begin to contextualise your behaviour and understand yourself better.
Reconnecting with yourself: You’ll be invited to begin to reconnect (or connect for the first time) with yourself and your needs, so you start to minimise yourself less and value your happiness and comfort more.
Learning to care for yourself: You’ll be encouraged to reflect on your difficulty with prioritising yourself and explore areas for small and comfortable change, so you finally start to include yourself in the care and kindness you offer everyone else.
Meet Elsie
Hello - it's so nice to know you're interested in the course! I always want people I work with to know that I get it; or at least I get my own version of why you’re probably thinking about starting to address your people-pleasing. And perhaps why you may also feel hesitant…
Embarking on this kind of exploration can feel daunting; I've designed this course knowing most people will likely be feeling just as fearful and anxious about doing this work as I once did. So if that’s you, know that I see you and know that the course is purposefully gentle.
I’d love you to take this step for yourself if it feels right. Feel free to run anything past me if it'll help you work it out - just email here.
Addressing your people-pleasing doesn’t have to be about living your life from a ‘me first’ perspective. It can just be about simply starting to say ‘me too’.
...how would that feel?
Purchase the course | £75
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